The Hidden Crisis: Protecting Our Autistic Children from Bullying, Wandering, Accidents, and Predators

Mommin' It Up – Real Talk for Real Autism Moms

I never thought I'd be writing a post like this.
But the statistics keep me awake at night, and I know I'm not the only autism parent staring at the ceiling at 3 a.m. wondering, "Is my child safe?"

Because the truth is: children and teens on the autism spectrum are dying.
Not just from rare medical complications — they're dying from bullying-induced suicide, wandering-related accidents, choking, abuse, and murder at rates that should outrage every single one of us.

Here's what the research says, plain and raw:

Suicide & Bullying: The Silent Epidemic

- Autistic individuals are up to 8 times more likely to die by suicide than neurotypical peers.
- A 2023 Swedish study found that 66% of autistic adults had experienced suicidal ideation, and 35% had made a suicide attempt.
- Bullying is the #1 trigger. Kids who are nonverbal or have obvious differences are mocked relentlessly. Even "high-functioning" kids get called "weird," "robot," or worse. The constant rejection chips away until some of our kids decide the world is better off without them.

I've held too many moms while they sobbed because their 12-year-old wrote a goodbye note after another day of being laughed at in the cafeteria.

Wandering (Elopement): The Terrifying Reality

- 49% of autistic children will elope at least once after age 4.
- Over 30% of those who go missing are nonverbal — they can't call for help or tell a stranger their name.
- Drowning is the #1 cause of death for wandering autistic kids under 14. Cars are #2.
- Many of our kids have zero danger awareness. Water is fascinating. Roads are just lines on the ground. They bolt toward anything that catches their interest — ponds, busy streets, train tracks.

Real names I'll never forget:

- Avonte Oquendo (14, nonverbal) — slipped out of school in New York, 2013. Remains found months later in the East River.
- Mikaela Lynch (9) — wandered from home in California, 2013. Found in a nearby creek.
- Adamus St. Germaine (7) — hit by a car after bolting from home in Florida.

These aren't "one-in-a-million" tragedies. This happens every single week somewhere in America.

First Responders: The Unsung Heroes

Law enforcement and search-and-rescue teams treat autistic wandering as a life-or-death emergency — because it is.
Many departments now train specifically for autism calls:

- Project Lifesaver bracelets
- "Autism Elopement Alert" forms families can pre-file with 911
- Drones with thermal imaging
- K9 units trained to track nonverbal kids

If your child bolts, call 911 immediately and say the words "autistic child, nonverbal, attracted to water." They will move heaven and earth.

Choking & Safety Awareness

Autistic kids often eat too fast, don't chew thoroughly, or mouth non-food items.
Choking is one of the top causes of accidental death in children with autism — especially those with pica or sensory-seeking behaviors.
Teach "tiny bites," use visual schedules for meals, and never, ever leave a child unsupervised while eating.

Abuse & Murder: The Cases We Can't Unsee

Our kids are vulnerable — and predators know it.

- Jewel Robinson (12, nonverbal) — murdered by her mother's boyfriend in 2022.
- London McCabe (6) — thrown off a bridge by his own mother in Oregon, 2014.
- The Hart Family — six adopted children, several autistic, driven off a cliff by their adoptive mothers in 2018.

Filicide rates for disabled children are heartbreakingly high. And when caregivers "snap," society too often responds with sympathy for the murderer instead of justice for the child.

Kidnapping Myths vs. Reality

Here's the one piece of "good" news: classic stranger abductions are rare for autistic kids with high support needs. Most predators target children who are compliant, quiet, and unlikely to report — but our severely autistic kids often scream, meltdown, or require 24/7 medical care that a kidnapper couldn't handle.

But Level 1 autistic teens and young adults? They are prime targets for online groomers.
Why?

- Intense interests make them easy to manipulate ("I love Minecraft too!")
- Difficulty reading social cues = can't spot red flags
- Deep desire to be liked + black-and-white thinking = "This person is my friend, they said so."

We've seen too many cases of autistic teens lured into meeting "online friends" who turned out to be sexual predators. Teach internet safety like your child's life depends on it — because it does.

Autism Rates Are Skyrocketing — And So Is the Crisis

In the 1980s, autism affected 1 in 10,000 kids.
Today? 1 in 36.
That's not just better diagnosis. Something is happening — and our society is completely unprepared for the wave of vulnerable children now entering adolescence and adulthood.

What We Can Do — TODAY

- Anti-bullying isn't enough — we need zero-tolerance policies and actual consequences.
- Locks, alarms, GPS trackers, ID bracelets — layer your safety plan.
- Swim lessons (ISR — Infant Swimming Resource — has saved countless autistic kids).
- Teach strangers your child's name with a medical alert bracelet or shoe tag.
- Monitor online activity — no shame in that when lives are at stake.
- Talk about suicide — even with young kids. "Are you having thoughts of hurting yourself?" is a question that saves lives.
- Support legislation — Kevin and Avonte's Law funds tracking programs nationwide.

Our kids are not tragedies waiting to happen.
They are human beings who deserve fierce protection.

If you're an autism parent reading this and your stomach is in knots — you're not alone.
We're in the trenches together.

Lock your doors.
Set your alarms.
Hold them tight.
And never stop fighting for them.

Because they are worth every single battle.

You've got this. We've got this.
But we can't do it silent.

Our kids are not tragedies waiting to happen.

They are human beings who deserve fierce protection.

If you're an autism parent reading this and your stomach is in knots: you're not alone.
We're in the trenches together.

Lock your doors.
Set your alarms.
Hold them tight.
And never stop fighting for them.

Because they are worth every single battle.

Do you have a story to share?
Whether it's a close call with wandering, the pain of watching your child be bullied, a victory with first responders, or a nightmare no one should ever live through, please reach out.
You can stay completely anonymous; I'll change every detail you want changed.
Every story deserves to be heard.

Silence goes unheard…
but words? Words can spark change.
And awareness, real awareness, can save lives.

If this post hit home, share it. Someone needs to see it today.
And if you're struggling, text or call 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) — they have autism-trained responders now.

You've got this. We've got this.
But we can't do it silent.

— A fellow autism mama who's mommin' it up, one terrifying day at a time. 💙